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The Interview

Sunday, Jun. 19, 2005|5:22 a.m.

The Interview

Recently, while reading the lovely and talented sock-girlie's journal (where everything's more fun in pigtails,) she answered five questions that were asked by Miss Sassy. When she answered these questions, she agreed to interview other people.

Thinking that I would be interrogated by her, much like someone would be interrogated in a late night movie on Cinemax, I jumped all over the opportunity. It turns out, it was nothing like that - but it was still a whole lot of fun.

So before I answer her questions, I thought I would tell you about the rules for this exercise.

1. If you want to participate in the fun too, send an email to justuhbill at aol dot com with a subject line that says interview me!
2. I will respond by asking you five questions. If you respond in the next thirty minutes, the five questions I ask you will be tailored just for you! Why? Because I am cool like that.
3. If someone says "stop," goes limp, or taps out, the fight is over. (wait - that's a rule of Fight Club. Sorry. Please ignore this rule. Technically I am not even allowed to talk about this.)
3a. An entire journal entry must be devoted to answering the questions I ask you - and you have to answer each and every one of them honestly. (Finally I will get Andria to admit that I kicked her ass in the crappy 80's song game we played about a month ago!)
4. In your question answering entry, you have to include an explanation of the rules, much like this, and offer to interview others.
5. When others ask to be interviewed, you need to ask them five original questions.
6. The reproduction of the pictures, descriptions, and accounts to the answers of these questions without the express written consent of Ramblin-Bill and Major League Baseball is strictly prohibited.

Those are the rules - at least to my understanding. So without further ado, here's the Q and A...

sock-girlie During your illustrious acting career, what is your favorite role that you have played?

Me: My acting career is actually a career? And illustrious? Holy crap! I am the last to find out EVERYTHING!

I've only been acting again for about two years (I did it in high school and college, but then stopped for about 10 years.) In the short time I've been doing it again, I'd say that my favorite role so far has been 'Clifton A. Feddington' in a show called "The 1940s Radio Hour."

Growing up I always wanted to be the host of my own show. In a strange way, this show allowed me to do that. I was the station manager and the host of 'The Mutual Manhattan Variety Cavalcade.' It was also the first 'starring' role I had since high school. It was a lot of fun, and I got to work with a great group of people.

sock-girlie Okay, TV-raised me Trivia Boy - be honest here (no googling!) because everyone thinks I�m crazy. Do you remember watching a) the short-lived 80�s sitcom Spencer, starring Chad Lowe, b) the short-lived 90�s sitcom The Good Life, starring a young Drew Carey and c) the video for �Norman Bates� by Landscape during the early days of MTV? ("My name is Norman Bates, doo doo do doo do doo...") d) Am I crazy?

Me: Technically speaking, this four questions. Cheater. And perhaps I need to rephrase my 'TV raised me' line. I should have said GOOD TV raised me, not crappy sitcoms from a guy whose wife couldn't even remember him when she won an Oscar. But let's go through the shows and the video one at a time...

Chad Lowe's sitcom, Spencer: No, I don't remember this sitcom at all. But I do remember the drama Spencer For Hire. Does that count? No? I didn't think so...

Drew Carey's sitcom, The Good Life: I don't think I remember this one either. But I do remember the early Jim Carrey vehicle, 'The Duck Factory.' Now that's gotta count for something! That doesn't count either? Damn it! I can't get a break!

The Norman Bates video: I do remember this song, although I didn't remember the band "Landscape." My sisters and I used to sing this song in public. When we did, people used to look at us funny. (Quite frankly, people always looked at us funny though.)

My younger sister 'borrowed' the tune from this song to make up song about her stuffed pig, Biwy Jay ("My name is Biwy Jay the pig, I'm just a normal pig...")

Interestingly enough, much like Tim, She's got pictures of Biwy Jay on vacation, in Europe, and in other compromising positions.

Unlike Tim, Biwy Jay doesn't have any pictures with celebrities - or his own web site. He only has a scrap book full of pictures.

Are you crazy: It's too early for me to say for sure, but the fact that you read my journal points to yes - yes you are crazy - but in a good way. :-)

sock-girlie Where would you rather live, Naboo or Tatooine?

Me: Honestly, is the only purpose of this question to prove that I am a big dork? :-) Well, I hate to disappoint you but I am not a big enough Star Wars fan to know enough about these two planets to answer this question.

But because I have an obligation to you to answer each of these questions, I did a little research. Here's what I found out.

Tatooine: Poor, with very little industry to boast, Tatooine is a mixture of hard-working locals attempting to extract a living from the unforgiving environment and transients visiting the world for illegal ventures.

Naboo: Naboo's surface consists of swampy lakes, rolling plains and green hills. Its population centers are beautiful -- Naboo's river cities are respendlent with classical architecture and greenery, while the underwater Gungan settlements are a beautiful display of exotic hydrostatic bubble technology.

Seriously, it blows me away that someone took the time to write these descriptions and post them on a very comprehensive web site like www.starwars.com.

Anyway, based on these two descriptions, the choice sounds simple, doesn't it? Naboo - hands down. But if you are going to live somewhere, you have to do complete research. And when I did, I found out that Naboo is home to this guy:

Yes, that is Jar Jar Binks. He lives on Naboo. I'll see you on my new home planet - Tatooine.

sock-girlie Which act did you prefer in the big Battle of the Bands scene in Xanadu: the big band, the rockers, or the combo?

Me: Ouch, first a dig on me going to see the midnight showing of the third Star Wars movie, now a dig on my love of Olivia Newton-John. What's next, a knock on my fetish of girls with webbed hands?

sock-girlie You are on a freak version of The Dating Game. Do you pick the girl with the tail, with webbed hands, or the bearded lady?

Me: Damn it! How in the hell did you know about that? :-) Seriously though, I'd have to pick the lady with the webbed hands. Why? Because mittens are cheaper than the electrolysis to get the bearded lady beard-free - and quite frankly, the tail would probably just get in the way.

And to finish answering the Xanadu question, that scene wasn't one of my favorite scenes in the movie. And the the big band singer with the red hair scared me. But in spite of that, I'd have to say the big band wins. Although I like how the crowds intermingle and dance together when the two songs combine.

Thanks sock-girlie, that was fun. Now who wants to be interviewed by me?

Previously on Ramblin' Bill -- In The Year 2000!

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