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Perhaps someday I will tell you more about me in this space. For now, you just have to learn it by reading my freakin' diary. Now get to it!


Last Five Entries

A note about a note - Monday, Mar. 26, 2007
It's so new it glitters. Okay, that's not true. None of it. - Tuesday, Feb. 27, 2007
Another MySpace Update - Friday, Jan. 12, 2007
MySpace Is Better Than Diaryland - Tuesday, Jan. 09, 2007
Go Over There - Monday, Oct. 09, 2006

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Butterfly Sunshine

A Trip To 'The Ed' and My New Movie

Sunday, Mar. 06, 2005|11:24 p.m.

Did I ever tell you that I've been on national television? It's true, it's true.

In July of 2002, I took my mom to NYC to see Letterman and a Broadway show. While we were in the audience of The Late Show, we were able to get on camera a few times. Here's one instance.

I am the guy below the arrow. I thought it was pretty cool of the guy behind me to hold up the arrow like that.

The woman to the left of me is my mom. The lady behind her wouldn't hold up an arrow for her. I am not sure why. We asked nicely and everything. She said something about being in Dave's audience and not being in an arena to see the WWF. Whatever that means. Bitch.

So anyway, this was the 4th or 5th time I had been to The Ed Sullivan Theater to see a taping of Dave, but it was my mom's first. She was very excited.

Every night before the show, Dave comes out for a few minutes to talk to the audience and answer a few questions. This night was no exception. When he asked if anyone had any questions, my mom raised her hand.

After first calling on someone else, Dave turned to my mom and said "Yes Ma'am, do you have a question?"

My mom said, "Yes, about a year ago I sent you a watch that's also a mosquito repellent since you were talking so much about getting West Nile Virus. I was wondering if you ever got the watch."

(As a side note, I want to point out that my mom does things like this all the time. She gets about eight million catalogs every day in the mail (no exaggeration,) and when she saw the watch in one of them, she knew she had to get it for Dave. That's my mom...)

Dave apologized to her, and explained that he never got the watch. At that point he had to run to start the show.

My mom was so excited - not only did she get to see Dave in the theater, but she also got to talk to Dave! She was in heaven.

After the opening credits, Dave came out to start the show. Before he told the first joke, he stopped and did this...

He slapped the back of his neck - as if he had just been bitten by a mosquito!

They very quickly cut to a close up of my mom laughing hysterically. (Unfortunately, I don't have a screen capture of that.)

He then went on with the show, never mentioning anything about the story on camera. It was a great inside joke with my mom and the rest of the audience - I understand he makes an inside joke like this every night.

It's a great memory.

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Can you believe that THIS was the number one movie in the country this weekend?


Vin Diesel plays Shane Wolfe, a Navy S.E.A.L. out of water in this hilarious new movie.

After failing a mission in which an intelligence agent is killed, Wolfe, the Navy's most elite S.E.A.L., is then assigned to protect that agent's cute and precocious children when the mom goes overseas.

Am I the only person who thinks this movie looks like a piece of garbage? And what kind of family has a pet duck? WTF?

I've decided that if Disney financed that piece of garbage, they may finance a similar piece of garbage story. So I took 30 seconds to write a movie. Here it is...


Snoop Dogg plays Lucky Stare, a pimp who is sentenced to coach a foreign soccer team in this funny new movie!

When Lucky Stare is caught pimpin' again, he fears a long stay in jail. Instead, the unorthodox judge (Bea Arthur) sentences him to become the new soccer coach of a young group of kids in Chinatown. Will they win the championship? Will Lucky turn over a new leaf? Find out this summer!

I am sure it will bring in millions!

Previously on Ramblin' Bill -- In The Year 2000!


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