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Perhaps someday I will tell you more about me in this space. For now, you just have to learn it by reading my freakin' diary. Now get to it!


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A note about a note - Monday, Mar. 26, 2007
It's so new it glitters. Okay, that's not true. None of it. - Tuesday, Feb. 27, 2007
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Go Over There - Monday, Oct. 09, 2006

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The Men's Room at Work

2003-10-15|11:50 p.m.

Not a lot going on right now... just took the last couple of days to rest up a bit before the show starts back up tomorrow. As a result, not a lot of time was spent writing new diary entries the last couple of days...

I was in the men's room at work today. I was in a stall using the "facilities" (C'mon, don't make me say I was takin' a crap) and someone went into the stall next to me.

Maybe I am strange, but personally I like to have the bathroom all to myself - especially when I have to sit down... As a matter of fact, usually I prefer to do that sort of thing in the privacy of my own home (like that guy from American Pie) but sometimes you just have to make an exception.

So anyway, after the person entered the stall next to me, I made a small 'bathroom noise'. (Christ, do I have to spell everything out for you? I ripped one.)

Now when that happened, stupid dude in the stall next to me, I guess trying to be funny, said "Oh, trying to blow me a kiss, huh?" and continued, "Well how about this?" and proceeded to try to make his own bathroom noise.

I guess he squeezed out a silent one, because then muttered under his breath, "Oh, that was a quiet one."

At that point I tried to go as fast as humanly possible to get out of the bathroom. I really wanted to avoid any further awkwardness... I quickly (but thoroughly - come on, I am not a pig) wiped, and hurried over to the sink to wash my hands.

Apparently stall boy wanted to talk some more, because he made his exit from his stall around the same time I walked out of mine.

At that point, he said something about "taking a dump is one of the best feelings in the world." and "When I was in the service, you just had to get in and get out, you couldn't take your time."

Not knowing how to respond, I just said "Sure." (pretty clever, huh?) and left the men's room, mentally scarred for life.

What the hell is wrong with people?

I am sorry if me sharing this grossed you out a bit... But I figure that if I had to be witness to it, others should be too.

Previously on Ramblin' Bill -- In The Year 2000!


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